Stupid crutch. I need to get rid of it, I can't deal with it anymore. The sad thing is that it doesn't hurt when I don't use it, I just look ridiculous! It is a terrible thing to ambulate with an antalgic gait pattern, especially when it can be corrected by using a crutch. I know it is only for a few more days, but I don't know how much longer I can take, I have run out of patience. I know last time, at this point, I was still on 2 crutches, but I feel so much better this time. And I keep saying to myself, ok, this is the last day with the crutch, and then I wake up and still need it.
I saw J for PT today, I didn't tolerate a traditional ITB stretch (Ober position) so she decided to do some manual release stuff, it killed, except for over my numb patch, see, something good came of it! I was able to do some more modified single leg bridges. Later in the day, I tried some of P's "custom for me" exercises, a psoas strengthener, sitting on the edge of a low treament table and holding my knee to my chest, without my hands. I was able to do it. Last time, this would have caused a terrible tendonitis flare up of the psoas, this time, no problem. I had a lot of psoas issues last time, we decided it was tightening so much bc it was so weak, that exercise helped target it and strengthen it.
I asked P for his blessing in not doing aqua therapy this time, since it was such a pain to chnage and be wet and smell like bleach all day.... he said no problem, as long as the gait issue resolves soon. I think we are all just so impressed with the change in recovery time from one side to the other. P watched me walk like a hundred times so we could figure out the problem with the gait. At first, he wasn't too convinced with my description, I said "I feel like I am circumducting my pelvis as I weight bear on the left". Huh??? He gave me a puzzled look, then watched, and watched again, and then a few more times, hmmmmm, what the heck are you doing while you walk?? See, I told you! "You're right" he said!! But why??? So I walked more. We decided that my hip extensors are weak, and I am having trouble eccentrically contracting my hip flexors, so I can't pull my body over my leg when it is on the ground while I am walking, so I thrust my pelvis out to the side to get over the leg. It is not as bad as it sounds, but not good for you, nonetheless. It is amazing how one crutch can instantly fix this.
On a more positive note, I went food shopping alone today. I had to limit my purchases to what would fit in my basket since I can't push the shopping cart yet, but it felt like a good accomplishment.
Later in the day, I needed to go to Target. For those of you not familiar with Target, it is the greatest place on earth, you can buy EVERYTHING there, seriously, you name, they have it. To illustrate my point, I will name a few items in my cart: Diapers, ball, milk, laundry detergent, floor cleaner, crayons, t-shirts, bathing suit, spray bottle. Target I couldn't do alone, so my nanny came + L and Jk, before their nap! It was quite a site, me on one crutch, and my nanny pushing my cart with both kids in it. I got them to behave by promising them we would go to Starbucks when we were done, which by the way, is inside of Target!
Being that I am sick of the whole crutch business, I needed to prove to myself, again, that I am capable of doing things on my own. So I cooked dinner, fed the kids and cleaned up (didn't do all the dishes yet, maybe J can pitch in). I also got sick of the kid's toys being in disarray all over the living room, my nanny thinks that if she piles them all in the corner, they are cleaned up. So I collected all the stray pieces from all the toys and matched them up with their respective owners. Lots of bending and standing and back and forth from room to room. I did fine with that.
This is a long post, but I need to get everything off my chest. I am having those "am I crazy" feelings again. Since I am not sure what is going on with my first hip, and the pain comes and goes, I start to wonder if I am imagining it, or what!!! After PT, it became painful, it was that awful, deep in the joint, squishy pain-like feeling that is so annoying you want to cut off your leg. Oh, just like before the first surgery, and just like then, exercise aggravates it. Shit. I hope I am just crazy!
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