Wednesday, December 5, 2007

If My Leg is Mine, Why Won't It Listen To Me

As Monday draws closer, and I plan on returning to work, bits of anxiety seem to be rising to the surface. I have not had any anxiety since I woke up from surgery. Now I am getting nervous. I am mentally very ready to return to work, but physically, I am not sure. My leg isn't doing what my brain commands.

Yesterday, I was walking to my car and an old lady was walking directly towards me, since I no longer use my crutch, people assume that I am 'normal' and can easily dodge these obstacles. My brain told my leg to quickly move to the right but my leg didn't quite get the message and I almost ended up colliding with the lady, I missed her by a hair.

Also, sometimes the phone will ring and I will be with the kids in one of their bedrooms, the phone will be in my bedroom, so I try to quickly get up and tell my leg to walk fast to grab the phone before voicemail picks up, but it just won't go.

There is still a little more weakness than makes me happy, but I have to keep reminding myself the extent of the work that was done plus the week I spent in bed wasting away! I am also not doing as much as I can for myself, I can do so many of my exercises at home but choose not to. I guess by the time I have time, it is really late and I would rather crash.

I am disappointed that only Jess responded to my previous post.

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