36 Hours To Go

I am unnaturally calm. I think I should rename this post "The Calm Before The Storm". I was really anxious yesterday, I had to tie up all loose ends at work, finish all my paperwork (Fridays I usually leave some paperwork for Monday!!), and make sure my replacement knew all my patients and what I do with them. Maybe now that that is behind me , I am more relaxed!
But who am I kidding, of course I am anxious about this. This time, I don't have the luxury of "ignorance is bliss", Last time, I could simply not fathom that my leg would hurt that much, boy was I wrong. So now I am going into surgery with the knowledge of what is waiting for me on the other end.

I also hate the fact that around 15 strangers will be seeing me completely naked, while I am asleep!! This is why I waxed, mani'd and pedi'd already. I know the morning of surgery I will be up blow drying my hair and applying make-up! Those OR lights can be harsh! I will also be spending the day tomorrow out by the pool, perfecting my tan!

All this takes my mind off of what really worries me...am I making the right decision? I hope I am, I have been doing really well with my first surgery (still not fully recovered from it, or my "twisting episode" on Thursday), will this surgery negatively impact the recovery and prognosis of the first surgery? Will this scope be all I need? Will I need a replacement soon down the road? Will I recover well from the anesthesia? All of this swims through my head, and increases my anxiety level, so I focus on what I can control, like my nail polish color!!

Luckily, I have a great deal of control when it comes to rehab, and I attribute my progress and well being at this point to a wonderful team of PT's who put up with my demands, complaining, worrying, and occasional doubts!
If everything this time goes as well as it has for me so far, I will be grateful, I feel truly blessed!
I hope to post at least once more before the surgery, but I know tomorrow may be hectic, L starts camp on Monday morning!!!!
Wish me luck!!!